A Passkey To Success

Have you ever known someone who always seemed to get what they wanted? Maybe it was that guy at work who went from visionary cubicle working stiff to powerful corner office head honcho in a short interval of time. Or your faired haired high school classmate with the glimmer in her eye, who made getting straight A’s “and being caption of the womens soccer team look like a cake walk. Their cups always seem to overflow and others marveled at their accomplishments.

Never did we hear them complain or worry (out loud for that matter). They always expected the best to happen and it did. Even when bad times fell on them, them always stayed in good spirits and like clockwork everything that they seemed to have lost was restored back and then some. And many onlookers were left wondering how they did it (and how to get their magic potion). Quite simply, the working stiff and the fair haired classmate probably believed they deserved to see their dreams become reality, and that the best that life had to offer was theirs. And, it was not a matter of being connected and knowing the “right” person, there was one defining pattern to these people, it was their attitude. Fortunately this can also be true for all of us.

We all live with an unconscious expectation of ourselves and our own lives. This expectation not only determines what we have in our lives but it also represents what we are willing to settle for. Expectation is a very powerful outlook and one that very few people ever learn to fully cultivate. Whatever you expect with certainty is what you will get in your life. Expectation is the intrinsic place where an idea becomes so real that you feel it even though you can’t hold it yet. Expectation is like an invisible magnet that will attract into your life that which you expect. When you expect something you activate and engage those parts of your mind and your nervous system that can empower you to think the unthinkable and do the undoable. Whatever thoughts you constantly feed your mind through out the day, your subconscious mind is taking it in. And it does not discriminate between the good thoughts or the bad thoughts, it takes it all in! What you earn right now is what you expect to earn. The amount of free time you have right now is what you expect to have as free time. The relationships you have are what you expect to have.

When you expect the best it’s not like expecting something good or something similar, it is the best and only the best. You have to stop settling for less than you can be or have. On a deep psychological level this is exactly what creates your expectations and that is why a lifetime of settling for less than you can be creates an expectation that is only “O.K.”. It becomes the standard that you are willing to settle for.

Great expectations create great results. When you expect the best it will become a directional mechanism that will guide you to seeking out and finding what you expect. The difference between great expectations and weak hopes start out with nothing more than a outlook or mind set; an outlook that can make the difference between living a life of fulfilment and one of desperation and frustration. Create the expectation by making sincere decisions. Nurture your expectations by never settling for anything less than the best. Over time you will no longer want to think negative and self destructing thoughts. You will choose joy, happiness, success, abundance and everything that you wish for yourself.

It is easy to change your expectations. You can do it in an instant. And that can be a menace. As too often, we lower our expectations because that seems easier than overcoming the obstacles which seem to stand in the way of fulfilling those expectations. Are you being forced to lower your expectations or are you choosing the “handy” way out? You must expect the best in order to achieve the best. Yet it takes more than just expectation. It takes commitment and performance. Don’t lower your expectations to meet your performance. Raise your level of performance to meet your expectations. Expect the best of yourself and then do what is necessary to make it a reality

You need no special skills or knowledge to raise your expectations. You simply need a decision that from this point onwards you will never again settle for anything less than you can possible be. The difference between hoping for something with uncertainty and depending on something with expectation is nothing but the way you direct the focus of your mind. What you say to yourself, the images you imagine and your behavior are what you can consciously direct. But, only if you choose to. If not, you will revert back to the autopilot of the masses just going with the flow of “whatever” comes along. The cultural autopilot is the emotional default and only through conscious and consistent nurturing of your desires and inclinations can you live life by your own standards and create the expectations that will lead you to a life of abundance and fulfilment.

In 1968, a study was conducted in San Francisco on teachers of students in grades one through six. Known as the Pygmalion Study, researchers who were involved gave the teachers incorrect information about their students; basically that the students were on the brink of intellectual growth. However, the students were really selected randomly and were not necessarily on the brink of anything. Nonetheless, the teachers believed and expected that the students were capable of great things and this resulted in high scores on IQ tests and other projects. After the study was completed, researchers concluded that the teachers’ belief in the students caused the students to experience outstanding intellectual growth. This study is a prime example of belief turning possibilities into reality.

Are you making a living or living your life? To “live” your life implies action–movement–excitement. Unfortunately, today most of us have our calendars so full we have little time to enjoy all the courses in the feast of life. It’s important that you value your precious time here on this planet.

Most of us believe that the hand we are dealt in life is what we will always hold. Sure, life is okay but it isn’t great; bills need to be paid, the kids are sick, and the bank account never seems to grow. After some time, you believe this is your life and how it will always play out. On the other hand, people who believe they deserve better play a different hand and they never have a poker face when it comes to their expectations.

When you expect only the best, you put yourself in a position of power. First and foremost, you send signals to your subconscious to help you notice and get what you desire (and deserve!).You get a check in the mail or you literally bump into the perfect woman at the coffee shop and she happens to live close by. Great expectations lead to great results.

Like every play, your life has its own story. Learn from the past but don’t get caught up in it. You can’t change it and you can’t expect or anticipate anything that has already taken place! And you don’t really know how it’s going to end, or even what’s coming up next. The best thing you can do is keep up with what’s going on and steer it in the direction you would like it to go. The rest will play out as it will.

In the morning, do not get out of bed until you sit back, fluff your pillows and fill yourself with words of loving encouragement and expectation. Ponder the words, let them sink in. Imagine the dreams you have for yourself. And finish by including a short proclamation for your day to be full of wonder, joy and guidance.

Listen to your intuition, for it is your best friend. Ignore your fears for they are definitely not in your best interest. Believe in your dreams for they are your future. Come to expect success in your life and everything you do, because you are constantly preparing for it. Expect the best out of life and you will get it!

Expect the best and the best will come…

5 Attributes Of Successful People

Disciplined, Uncompromising, Tough, Courageous and Humourous (D.U.T.C.H). The 5 main attributes that are to be found in most successful people. This has resulted from a careful study of the main personality traits to be found in the worlds most successful people from politicians, sportsmen and women and business people.

Disciplined

Successful people are well organised and self disciplined. Often they have been brought up in a structured disciplined environment. From being led they know how to lead. They are respectful of others and know how to command respect from others. They understand the importance of loyalty and demand loyalty from others.

Uncompromising

Successful people do not accept half measures. They do not tolerate incompetence. They speak out against injustice. They stand up to unnecessary bureaucracy and demand fairness and correctness in the world around them. They will ‘fight their corner’ in every situation.

Tough

Successful people are tough. They resist personal attack without emotional reactions. They possess a ‘thick skin’. They are able to accept critisism without being offended.

Courageous

Successful people have the courage of their beliefs and convictions. They are able to face up to adversity. They succeed often against huge odds because they have the courage and the vision to plough through all the barriers and obstacles placed in their way.

Humourous

Successful people will possess a sense of humour. They will not become stressed and will often overcome difficult situations by their wit and well placed humour.
Be sure to remember D.U.T.C.H to remind you of the 5 attributes of successful people. This is by no means an exhaustive list of attributes possessed by successful people but by concentrating on these 5 will give you a good head start in your self help process and you will find that all other attributes necessary to make you successful will fall into place naturally.

Are You Afraid Of Success ?

It is well documented that many people fail to achieve their goals in life due to the phenomenon known as “fear of failure” but are you aware that a major factor that is often overlooked, is a state known as “fear of success”?

Fear of failure will lead many people into inertia – the inability to make decision or take action in case they receive rejection or negative outcomes. This mental state is fairky easy to identify and there are many tools in the personal development industry to help combat this plague and reprogram the mind for success. However, the fear of success is much more subtle, harder to spot and also harder to eradicate.

Perhaps you have this tendency in your life. Here are some indications of a fear of success mentality.

Studying and trying to implement self-improvement techniques and/or personal development tools but your life does not improve or may even get worse.

You settle for less than you feel you deserve or are capable of achieving.

You start new projects full of enthusiasm and optimism but wane in your efforts or stop short before you have completed them.

You expect things to go wrong no matter how well the situation appears to be at the moment.

Can you identify your own patterns in the any of the above statements?

The fear of success can also make you behave in ways that hold you back. Look at the list below. These are ethe symptoms of the fear of success.

Procrastination – putting off what needs to be done or not doing what you know will bring you closer to your desired result. Everyone suffers from this inner ‘demon’ at some point in their lives (although some of us suffer from it more than others!).

Procrastination is a ‘success killer’! How can ou expect to reach your destinationm if you do not take steps towards it? Strive to do little things each day that will bring you small steps closer to your goal. This is why having a personal development plan is an essential ingredient in the fight against procrastination. Take action! Any action! Refine your steps as you go along but do not sit and do nothing. Taking action is one of the key aspects in personal development.

Can’t see the forest for the trees! – this is almost the opposite of procrastination but has the same effect on your personal development. The aforementioned saying is well known but have you ever given it real consideration?

Don’t get caught up in your plan believing that it is more important than the materialised goal! For many years I got caught in this trap. I started to think and act as though my plan was more important than my end result and thus missed many opportunities to alter my path and reach my goals more quickly! Let go of your ego and allow the Universe to show you a quicker route to your goal. Remain flexible.

Thinking that the time is not right – have you ever waited until the timing was perfect before starting a venture? Have you ever waited until you had more information on a better plan?

Again ACTION is the key to the door to success. Taking small steps forward are better than taking none or waiting to see if your foot is landing on the right spot! Even if your actions take you away from your goal you have at least gained insight and knowledge about what does not work!

Being a perfectionist – this is similar to the point above and has the same effect, namely, that you never really move forward. No matter how good a job is when its finished it can always be improved! I have heard many great musicians tell how they hate listening to their own songs because they can find a million things that need improved. Yet, we still enjoy them. I think a classic example of this is “Bridge Over Troubled Water” by Paul Simon. This song is hauntingly beautiful yet Mr. Simon does not think its good enough!

Seeing only problems – how do you use your focus? Do you constantly see only and alll the problems involved? If you are this way inclined it is pointless trying to change overnight! However, you can use this mindset to your advantage while you strive in your personal development to acquire an opportunistic frame of mind instead.

“How can you use seeing only problems to my advantage?” you say. “Easily”, is my reply! Look at the problems and prepare a plan to deal with them. Everytime you overcome one congratulate yourself. Use them as a gauge for your achievements. If you keep seeing more problems remind yourself of how well you dealt with the others. Look at how far you have come! If you see a problem ask yourself, “how best can I overcome this challenge?” or “how quickly can I rectify this situation?”. The quality of your questions are important as I have outlined in a previous article. Use the problems as fact finders. Is there a real problem now? If so then deal with it. Is it a potential problem? If so then create a contingency plan in case it does occur but don’t get caught up in it just be prepared.

Enjoy the journey, follow the above guidelines and you will achieve success. Eventually your fear of success will dissipate and you will have moved a long way forward in your personal development.